What trivial act would you like to ban or make illegal? Personally, I would like to outlaw public speakers who start off by saying, "I can't hear you!" or "Let's try that again!"

danger_mcboom · 3 days

Evangelism.

MagikalGiant · 6 days

One day my brother and I were getting high all day at my friend's house when there was a power outage. Because there wasn't anything to do in the dark, my brother and I started walking home. It was after dark and even the street lights were out. Because we were getting high all day, we had the munchies and had eaten a pizza so we both had some pretty bad gas. So there we were walking in complete darkness farting our way home when I got the idea to light a fart on fire. The resulting fireball was so bright in the darkness that it appeared daylight to us for a split second and we were able to see our surroundings and realised that we had been walking the wrong way. In 20 years of smoking nearly every day, this is the worst thing that ever happened to me as a result of marijuana.

realitygenrator · 18 days

Kicking her to the curb in anger and getting a bottle are going to make you feel minimally better for a day or two then you will end up crying like a little girl for weeks. I went through this after 10 years of dating a woman I have 3 children with. First you must understand why she is doing this. The reason is that she needs the attention and you can't give it to her. Your attention is old news and she doesn't have to do anything to earn it. She is sending pics to other guys in hopes that they will find value in her. After I understood this (thanks Neil Strauss) I brought the pictures to my girlfriend and showed her that I found them and complimented her on how good she looks in them and offered to take the pics next time so she doesn't have to pose with the camera. I also directed her to several websites where she could show off to random guys and get all of the attention she wants from the internet. I also informed her that this meant that we are now in an open relationship and that I would be dating whoever I wanted. It took exactly 1 woman within her eyesight with my arm around her shoulder before she was competing for my attention again. Any time I see that she's getting social on the internet again I simply shoot a text to a friend and when she asks who it's to, I tell her she doesn't want to know. Now I know you may say that she would just leave if you tried this on her but you already kicked her out so what do you have to lose?

WWWEH · 2 months

That would be the first year the Beatles played in Japan. Since the death rate seems to not be affected then we can safely say that the drop was a fertility issue. They were all saving themselves for Paul McCartney.

realitygenrator · 2 months

1/2 lb cannibutter made with 7g of mid grade trees made about 2 dozen. Oh ya and Andies Candies chips instead of chocolate chips.

realitygenrator · 2 months

1/2 lb cannibutter made with 7g of mid grade trees made about 2 dozen. Oh ya and Andies Candies chips instead of chocolate chips. Is there a subreddit for cooking with Trees? What is it called?

Jsocia · 2 months

Roll a D20 and stop that monkey molester!

PartSockMonkey · 2 months

I used to work for a Subway franchiser as a store manager. The franchise company consisted of a family of 2 older parents who I was unable to contact and 2 adult children who were as spoiled as any humans I have ever met. When the son in the family came to my store and frequently "counted the safe" he would routinely replace cash with IOUs. I complained to him about this and he said that it would be ok. After months of this, one day he came in to count the safe with his dad, the company owner. He then opened the safe and showed that there were no IOUs in it but that there was over $2200 missing. I was not fired but I was told that they would be taking half of my pay check until it was paid back. I was handed a prepared "contract" and was expected to sign admitting guilt and agreeing to pay it back. I quit my job on the spot and reported it to the police. 3 months later I was served a summons and was sued for the money. Luckily they had no evidence, so the judge ruled in my favor.

pluspluskid · 2 months

I slip into a dimension where my novels are real and I am poisoned by the atmosphere of future Earth.

quidditch5 · 2 months

How about I use my boy scout pocket knife to slice your taint then use the blood as lube to assfuck you then I come into the wound?

iamneilstrauss · 3 months

repost at your request because you probably lost it- I completed the 30 day challenge just over a week ago. On day 4 I got a number and f-closed on day 5. This chick has now spent thousands of dollars on me but she's an obvious psycho. How do I get rid of her without risking her doing something crazy? BTW 30 day challenge worked for me. I am sarging 3-4 times a week now. Thank you Neil.

She is obsessed with trying to make me her BF. I have made it clear that I am dating other women.

iamneilstrauss · 3 months

She's a former 9 but at 38 she's dropped to an 8. Should also mention that she is married.

iamneilstrauss · 3 months

She is obsessed with trying to make me her boyfriend. I have made it very clear that I am dating other women. She says she doesn't care but then makes every attempt to cock block me.

iamneilstrauss · 3 months

I completed the 30 day challenge just over a week ago. On day 4 I got a number and f-closed on day 5. This chick has now spent thousands of dollars on me but she's an obvious psycho. How do I get rid of her without risking her doing something crazy? BTW 30 day challenge worked for me. I am sarging 3-4 times a week now. Thank you Neil.

realitygenrator · 3 months

Thank you for bringing that to my attention. I am new to reddit and I didn't mark it NSFW because I didn't Include the link to my wife's post. I have now marked it NSFW.

realitygenrator · 3 months

actual link to pic in question [nsfw] /r/gonewild

realitygenrator · 3 months

This was a pm conversation on my wife's account. She is blueeyeddemon. you may perv her on /r/gonewild

realitygenrator · 3 months

Saw this while delivering pizza

realitygenrator

TROPHY CASE

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