aww you just made me cry at work, you're absolutely right, I didn't realized until today that our fighting sometimes was affecting him, and the fact that after I would have a cigarette I would have to change my clothes and wash my face, arms, and hands to touch him, sometimes it was an emergency and I would have to pick him up right after coming back inside from the balcony after smoking. It hurt me, I knew what I was doing was wrong. So I changed it, and now everything around us is getting better, we don't depend on our parents as much, which in turn has made our parents back off a little and they trust us completely now, I actually find myself giving my dad advice now. I grew up enormously, granted I am 24 and I still have so much more to grow and learn, I feel I made a huge difference in our lives, Can't wait to see how much better it get's once I can start putting the money I'm making into saving. I never saved money before a day in my life, I just got my first checking account ever and after my next paycheck we will be completely caught up and we will be able to save some of that money!