Hey Reddit. I'm sitting in the hospital with my dad who's just had three seizures today. What are some funny stories you guys have that I can read out to him?

MyHorseIsDead · 2012-05-24T22:52:27.183942+00:00

Gradual_Nessie?

Edit: to anyone who might try, it's already taken.

ladyledylidy · 2012-05-24T22:34:55.627862+00:00

So far the best night of my life was pretty simply, and it happened just about two weeks ago. My friends and I got together to end the semester with style (read: large quantities of alcohol) and decided we couldn't stay crammed in my apartment. So we went to the pizza place on campus and decided to eat everything. I ended up dropping my phone in gravy (which resulted in outsmarting the Apple store, but that's a different story) before leaving. When we left, I decided to light up a cigarette (I don't even smoke and I can't remember why I had them on me). A couple girls noticed us from a table outside and called us over. I was apparently the only one who heard, so I went to chat with them, and soon my friends followed suit. Commence epic 3am ultimate frisbee game. Light up frisbees are cool sober, magical when drunk. We played for a good hour and a half, just laughing and falling and having a good time.

MyHorseIsDead · 2012-05-24T22:30:27.180089+00:00

I like having friends, especially internet friends

Teddy_Westside14 · 2012-05-24T15:13:40.146898-07:00

I wanted something creative but not over the top. So I went on a screen name generator online and I rather liked the sound of munoodle

jesuswig · 2012-05-24T21:56:25.024060+00:00

Walking down a path post rain and every other step or so you make one of those little slips that doesn't take you all the way down, but still enough to make you pissed off. Forever

MyHorseIsDead · 2012-05-24T21:50:40.669716+00:00

This is the kind of crap my family does. The darkest joke I remember is while my grandmother was essentially on her deathbed from lung cancer. The whole family was in there (her 7 kids and their families) and the nurse came in to do an oxygen reading. Commence at least 10 people throwing down money betting on what the reading would be, and cheers and high fives when my uncle won. I lost more than a grandmother that year, I also lost about $3

munoodle · 1 day

Ever since learning that word I've been trying to use it and realized that one does not simply work "mellifluent" into every day conversation

munoodle · 1 day

Loong time lurker, never had anything to contribute before though, so diving in with this!

munoodle · 1 day

Haha thank you very much

what_ever_man · 2 days

No you're thinking of a chariot, I think he means what you do when you look at someone intently without blinking

xxkibblezxx · 2 days

From speaking to soldiers who have been to Kandahar, I understand Restrepo is pretty dead on

what_ever_man · 3 days

No you're thinking of Cher. I think he means the former leader of the Communist Party of China

thec0rinthian · 4 days

I still have my Fender Strat knockoff and it's fun to play the 3 songs that I know on heavy distortion, but I wish I had time to get better lol. Oh but put my on any rhythm game (guitar hero, rock band, ddr, dj hero, beatmania) and I'm a boss!

thec0rinthian · 4 days

I'd lean toward the natural talent. I've shot rifles since I was very young, and have always been semi decent (not expert level by any means though). After years of my fps "experience" I decided to give pistol shooting a try. Turns out I'm god awful at it

thec0rinthian · 4 days

I had no intention either, but one Christmas when I asked for Guitar Hero my parents got me an electric guitar as well, because why the hell not? Definitely two very different things, and I can't play very well, but I'm glad I at least tried because it piqued my interested in music as a whole.

thepandoras · 5 days

use your thumb!

thepandoras · 5 days

A ruler on the inside of my thigh ;)

laksalover · 8 days

I'm glad you are being so cool about it and not turning into a harpie, I like you! Tagging as "doesn't suck"

IAmSoMeanMwahah · 8 days

I wear pants all day so I can not wear pants at home!

IAmSoMeanMwahah · 8 days

That's no joke. I made a post a little while back in this subreddit that I was doing to pass the time, fully expected the downvote train to come in, and front paged. Seriously no planning went into that. Never happened again, so I take it I got lucky. I do like my comment karma though, it makes me smile

laksalover · 9 days

whoops, my bad. It's just the internet, I'm still not fairly convinced girls willingly come on here while they are busy being pretty and putting up with our shit

laksalover · 9 days

I'm a humanities major, I don't know how to math

laksalover · 9 days

"God damn it tornado put those cows down ^{howmanytimesdoihavetotellyou?} "

laksalover · 10 days

It was in dog years, so really he's 30

munoodle

TROPHY CASE

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