I almost lost it

maineface · 2012-05-25T20:52:14.737780+00:00

I worked for a guy years ago that asked me after the first day "Do you smoke?" while I was smoking a cigarette... When I told him yeah, he said "Good, because I wasn't going to hire you if you didn't".

I made a lot of money and had a lot of fun working with that guy.

derpent024 · 2012-05-25T11:36:05.584437+00:00

I could've sworn that said something about an ashtray and I'm not even high.

fuckape · 5 days

They're not late. They got there right on time. It just takes 10 minutes to check out the scene and determine if you're trying to set them up to get robbed.

standard_username · 5 days

Get a giant ego.

ajax_2232 · 5 days

Right now she feels like she has no control. Any time you think about doing or saying something ask yourself, "Am I empowering her, or taking more control out of her hands?".

Jinjit · 5 days

I've been to more funerals than birthday parties. My best advice is to sit in the shower and cry for a couple of minutes after you're clean occasionally. Leave it all in the shower.

Incredible_is_i · 7 days

Slugs eat the dried up trail of other slugs. The only thing that can remove dried up slug trail is another slug. Slugs have been following invisible paths laid down by their ancestors since the dawn of time.

imreallyfake · 9 days

It's not about what I like; It's about what she's in the mood for...

wagstagsthird · 9 days

I don't understand, what hurts?

CuriousThought · 12 days

Lots of contrast and detail in the iris.

yellowpride · 12 days

Did you know tyrannosauruses were not skilled dart players due to their short arms and movement based vision?

yellowpride · 12 days

Fool me once, shame on you...

Frank_Salazar · 12 days

There are 3 types of people, leaders, followers, and runners.

teegle1 · 12 days

"My friends hand was mangled in an accident, and this is his Easter bunny." -- Try that come Easter, and see how long it takes someone to ask you if your friend is Jesus.

987123 · 13 days

I sat here for maybe 5 minutes thinking of an answer to this question only to decide I don't want to answer it. Although, I still have; If you read between the lines.

NiagaElRei · 13 days

Bat Man Wheels

DatsNos · 13 days

mrjoebert · 22 days

Masters of momentum.

mrjoebert · 22 days

Because it's fun, it gives you a sense of freedom and being able to do something most people are afraid to try.

kmcleod · 23 days

I'm going to trick one of your friends into posting that on Facebook; That way I can watch you tell yourself what I don't have the heart to say and shake my head as you and your friends laugh at you.

penguinrusty · 1 month

You haven't found yourself in a predicament until you've considered squatting over a sink to wash your ass in a public restroom.

markedwords · 1 month

I'd have a camera crew follow me around and act entirely on impulse. Then pitch the tapes as a REAL, reality show.

DatsNos · 1 month

Everything is possible, until proven otherwise. Even being proven otherwise is possible, meaning everything is both possible and impossible.

TheStarsMist · 1 month

Well shit, I didn't even realize mine had one until just now.

TheStarsMist · 1 month

We should just be glad it doesn't take a rocket scientist to remove the things.

mrjoebert

TROPHY CASE

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