Yay!

A few years ago all the lymph nodes swelled up on the right side of my neck, and I got a particularly large lump near my collarbone. I also developed a constant low fever, sore throat etc, like mono but usually when you get that the swelling is on both sides and you don't get a single large lump anywhere. Some other freaky things happened too, like the entire inside of my cheek just split open one day (?!). Still haven't figured out what happened there... Anyway, I had a blood test done, they couldn't rule out cancer, I had a CT scan, they still couldn't rule out cancer, they tried to send me for a blood culture to try to confirm an active mono infection but you can only do that when you have a fever and my fever decided to go away for several days. So FINALLY they ordered a biopsy which confirmed, >1 month later, that it wasn't cancer. Never found out what it was, probably weird mono.

... a few days later, I got dysentery. But not cancer!