I decided to give my Dalek a Lisa Frank makeover!

ZhuMaDian · 2 months

college-aged or twenty-somethings would have worked, i think

SweetDeez · 2 months

oh my god i want to cry just thinking about that episode. but yes, definitely a must see.

catertots · 2 months

no, i don't hate men. i just hate you. this is my last response to your idiotic vitriol. just know there's someone out there in the world who literally and wholeheartedly wishes, hopes and prays that you choke on your own semen someday.

catertots · 2 months

i'd like to remind you that you know zero things about me, other than i don't reply to people on okcupid if i don't like them. from that information you can extrapolate exactly nothing.

You think you owe them more than the sorry no thanks message. After that, whatever they say, you don't have to deal with it.

um, actually i don't think i owe them shit. which is why i don't reply to them in the first place? which is what you got on my case for in your previous comment? pick an opinion. am i playing the victim for feeling the need to reply or am i an asshole for not replying? and actually, as i said before, I DO HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. i have to read it, and see it in the first place. that is dealing with it. and it's something i don't have to deal with when i don't respond initially.

as for attracting/declining creeps, EVERY GIRL on okcupid has to deal with sorting through creeps to get to a normal person. every single one. i am not alone in this. every girl who commented in this entire thread, and especially the one i linked you to, talked about having to deal with retaliatory pricks. but i guess maybe in your alternate reality, every girl just likes playing the victim, and isn't justified in not wanting to deal with creeps.

i would just like to reiterate that you are way the fuck out of your depth in terms of knowing or understanding what girls on dating websites are up against. that's not victimhood talking, that's just how it is. and i'm happy to put up with it if it means finding meaningful relationships on the site, which is has for me. i've been on okcupid for like three years, and a lot of the people i've met are still happily in my life. so i'd say my method is working. if you think it's not okay by your own personal standards of politeness, great, but i will very politely tell you to go die in a fire.

catertots · 2 months

and here's a permalink to the comment showing that i'm not the only one who doesn't reply because of what happens when i do.

http://www.reddit.com/r/OkCupid/comments/nc7os/if_youre_a_person_and_you_do_this_fuck_you/c383111

catertots · 2 months

haha, you think copy pasting the same thing to every guy i get messages from would make them feel better? soothe their wounded egos? right. try being a girl on a dating site. i tried replying to everyone at first, because i thought i had to be apologetic and nice about the fact that i didn't like them, but then they wouldn't let it go. they would respond to my little "sorry no thanks etc etc" messages with "BUT WHY. WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME. WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO DATE ME, I DON'T UNDERSTAND." and then i felt like i had to engage them further and nicely explain exactly why i didn't want to date them. so now i've wasted how much time on a guy I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO TALK TO IN THE FIRST PLACE? that's bullshit.

you want to talk about people feeling like they can hide in the internet? how about these guys feeling like because it's the internet and there's relative anonymity that they can attack me for something like not being interested in them. yeah, the messages asking why i wasn't interested were annoying, but they're nothing compared to being called a whore or an idiot or a terrible person for deciding they weren't the guy for me. or even getting a defensive "hey i was just making conversation! i'm not interested like THAT, ugh god don't flatter yourself." there is seriously no winning.

so bully for you that you get to send women off with a trite little copy/paste, but the guys i have to deal with are often nowhere near that easy to dissuade. so come talk to me when you have a tiny inkling of what it's like to deal with that on a DAILY basis. so yes, now i don't reply unless i'm interested. and if that somehow makes me a jaded, entitled, ass who only sees people as pieces of meat, well, then, i guess that's what i am!

basically, you have no fucking idea what you're talking about, and until you grow a vagina and join okcupid, you never will.

catertots · 2 months

first of all, this isn't real life. different rules apply. this is a website whose sole purpose is to facilitate people meeting to date or become friends. therefore, if you do not fulfill my standards of dating or friendship, i have no reason to pursue messaging you. that isn't disrespectful at all. there is no social requisite that i message back when i have no interest in the person. in fact, i think it's way worse to politely respond to whatever they said, implying that you're interested, even when you're not.

in real life, intentions are not so clear. you don't know if the person coming up to you has the intention of dating you or befriending you; they could be asking for the time, or trying to murder you, or something else entirely. but it is also not my responsibility to fulfill their desires if they are conflicting with mine. so while i would be initially polite to someone coming up to me in person, i would also not owe him/her jack shit.

just like i don't owe anyone on okcupid who messages me jack shit.

once i determined the person i was meeting in real life was not someone i was interested in on a dating or friendship level, i would politely suggest they not contact me. on okcupid, profiles and messages exist so that you can make that initial determination before you decide to message back. so, no reply = sorry pal, move along. it's the same principle applied to a different medium. neither one is disrespectful.

people, be they men or women, don't owe you dates or conversations, ever, at all, for any reason. if you interpret disinterest as disrespect, you're going to spend a lot of time feeling like shit. take it for what it is and don't get offended when you're not someone's cup of tea.

OutOfNames · 2 months

Adagio has been an awesome resource for me. I love the layout of their site and their prices seem reasonable to me, although I'm fairly new to buying tea in bulk, so maybe it just seems extra reasonable? Either way, they have a big selection that's easy to browse through, great sampler packs/sample sizes of most teas, and helpful reviews. I also really like that they do their best to give you a flavor profile so you know ballpark what you're getting, and have a "if you like this tea, try this other one!" spot next to the reviews of most of their teas. I've been really happy with my purchases! And they have a reward point system that you're automatically signed up for that gives you coupons and after a certain amount of points you get like $10 to spend in the store or something. Sorry this is so long, but I thought it would be more helpful than just saying the name of the store.

Annodyne · 3 months

she's covering up something on her bicep, not the jabberwocky!

schlitz100 · 3 months

the sister sizing isn't to replace your own size, it's just to offer you more options in the case that your actual size isn't available.

schlitz100 · 3 months

i used to work at victoria's secret, so maybe i can offer some insight. during training we're taught about sister sizes, which is basically +/- a cup and +/- a band size to work with bras that fit differently than normal or, in your case, customers whose true size we don't carry. since we don't carry 28C, your sister size would be a 30B (which is still too small a band size for us to carry) or a 26D (which i'm pretty sure doesn't exist), so she was offering you the closest sister size to your size that victoria's secret makes, a 32B. obviously not ideal, but that's your only option for a VS store. i can't speak to her pushiness, but what she told you wasn't ridiculous or over the top. also, have you ever tried the sister size? it actually is kind of exactly the same. sometimes when my size is out, i just buy the sister size and there is pretty much no difference.

schlitz100 · 3 months

thank you, you just saved me the time of typing this all out. that salesgirl wasn't an idiot, she was suggesting the sister size. i used to work at victoria's secret and that's part of the training.

catertots · 3 months

thanks i'll look into it :)

catertots · 3 months

thanks for the video!

catertots · 3 months

No, I get that, and I'm looking forward to going and immersing myself further. I just felt that this was an easier first step for me with my current location/schedule.

catertots · 3 months

Good advice! I don't usually, but not because I knew not to, haha

catertots · 3 months

Oh this is really cool! Thanks I'm definitely bookmarking this :)

catertots · 3 months

Thanks!! Someone else in this thread suggested Adagio, and I actually just ordered the raja sampler just from searching around on there! Looking forward to trying it. I'll look at their other stuff too :)

catertots · 3 months

Thanks!! I just looked it up, apparently there are a couple Peet's stores near enough to me to make it worth my while.

I'm sure that was the problem, then. I ordered a sample size of earl grey to try, so I'll play with the steeping times and see if the problem was steeping too long or just low quality tea or if it's just not the tea for me.

Thanks for the chai and green tea info. I'll give loose green tea a try, since my main issue with green tea is/was just the lack of flavor, but loose tea should help rectify that :)

catertots · 3 months

Ack I wish I'd seen this five minutes ago, I just ordered a few samples from them based on a recommendation elsewhere in this thread!

catertots · 3 months

Yes, I'm definitely going to get a french press as my steeper rather than some of the other devices I've seen online. I like A LOT of tea, and it would be so nice to be able to make more rather than less at a time!

I just checked out Adagio Tea and the website is super helpful, I love that they have a rating system and so much info for each tea, including recommendations! I just ordered the raja sampler and some other samples. Thanks so much for the resource!

I ordered a sample size of their earl grey moonlight to see if the problem was my crappy bagged supermarket earl grey, and I will definitely play with the steep times. I tend to steep teas too long, I think I'll probably invest in a timer while I'm at it. My problem with the green teas I've tried is that they're pretty bland and forgettable, but again, I've only been dealing with bags, so.

catertots · 3 months

Thank you for the source! I just ordered some of this stuff: http://www.yunnansourcing.us/store/product.php?id_product=186

I'm so excited to try it, it sounds delicious. I'm going to look into getting some samplers, too, that was a great suggestion. Thanks!!!

catertots · 3 months

Maybe I used the wrong word. I love really strong black teas with a lot of flavor; I like to add a little dash of cream and I still want to be able to taste the tea through it. However, in my experiences with earl grey and darjeeling, there has been a very sharp, bitter aftertaste to it that I really can't stand. I don't find this to be the case with English/Irish breakfast. It's wholly probable that I've been steeping it too long and/or only getting low quality tea, which could be the entire root of the problem.

catertots · 3 months

this was incredibly helpful, thank you so much!!

catertots

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