Flusteredpenguin

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How I felt every time someone ordered one when I worked at Starbucks... (quickmeme.com)

submitted ago by Flusteredpenguin to AdviceAnimals

Midnight Express - Based on Writer/Actor/Director Billy Hayes' experience in a Turkish prison by Flusteredpenguinin NetflixBestOf

[–]Flusteredpenguin[S] 1 point2 points ago

BILLY MAYS HERE with a new FAAAAANtastic product! Tired of shitty food and daily beatings? Well then you need BREAK AWAY! GUARANTEED to melt through even the HEARTIEST brick, stone, metal, or concrete!

Dat voice! by Flusteredpenguinin WTF

[–]Flusteredpenguin[S] 0 points1 point ago

Thanks. Where can I redirect it to then?

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Dat voice! (youtube.com)

submitted ago by Flusteredpenguin to WTF

What's the worst attempt at dirty talk you've heard/said? [NSFW] by CraptainHammerin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 2 points3 points ago

You're a miserable excuse for a whale biologist!

What's the worst attempt at dirty talk you've heard/said? [NSFW] by CraptainHammerin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

HE CAN PLEASE ANY WOMAN WITH A FLICK OF HIS WRIST!

What's the worst attempt at dirty talk you've heard/said? [NSFW] by CraptainHammerin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 3 points4 points ago

Nope, just a monocle.

Do you like the artsy type? by notjadedyetin shittyladyboners

[–]Flusteredpenguin 1 point2 points ago

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD

What's the worst attempt at dirty talk you've heard/said? [NSFW] by CraptainHammerin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 1306 points1307 points ago

Me - "Oh yeah, Fuck me!"

Him -"But I'm a gentleman!!!!!"

...literally out of nowhere mid sex.

Do you like the artsy type? by notjadedyetin shittyladyboners

[–]Flusteredpenguin 1 point2 points ago

I'll bet your scalp is soooooo smooth

What is the most awkward way someone else has tried to initiate sex? by tasteslikeeggrollsin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

Wow, a real life porn scenario. Most pizza delivery men/plumbers/gas station attendants only DREAM of that!

What is the most awkward way someone else has tried to initiate sex? by tasteslikeeggrollsin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

My really shitty, overweight, pedobear-looking manager's name is Keith...I just died a little inside...

Ladies, may I present r/shittyladyboners. Sometimes you need a little mediocre in your life. by Flusteredpenguinin LadyBoners

[–]Flusteredpenguin[S] 0 points1 point ago

Me too, actually

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Ladies, may I present r/shittyladyboners. Sometimes you need a little mediocre in your life. (reddit.com)

submitted ago by Flusteredpenguin to LadyBoners

My friend witnessed a rejected public marriage proposal last night... which ultimately became a break-up. What are some of your worst moments of second-hand embarrassment Reddit? by Rhymnocerusin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

Anal

My friend witnessed a rejected public marriage proposal last night... which ultimately became a break-up. What are some of your worst moments of second-hand embarrassment Reddit? by Rhymnocerusin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 7 points8 points ago

I'm a waitress. This happens all the time and it KILLS me. I'm not the most socially savy person, so I never know what to say. I think the worst was when this one couple's card got declined and the guy called his sister so they could use her card. She gave me her card info over the phone. As you might expect, they didn't even leave a tip.

My friend witnessed a rejected public marriage proposal last night... which ultimately became a break-up. What are some of your worst moments of second-hand embarrassment Reddit? by Rhymnocerusin AskReddit

[–]Flusteredpenguin 205 points206 points ago

SHE should definitely be the one who's embarassed. Sounds like a bitch.

DAE make a point to talk to less popular people, because you know how it feels to be the outcast? by sweetmojaveraiinin DoesAnybodyElse

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

Nah, I don't do that. I'm an introvert, so I don't try to make them the center of attention or make them converse or anything. I just go out of my way to say hi and acknowledge that they're there.

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DAE get mad when a friend treats you like a sidekick or acts like a mentor toward you? (self.DoesAnybodyElse)

submitted ago by Flusteredpenguin to DoesAnybodyElse

DAE make a point to talk to less popular people, because you know how it feels to be the outcast? by sweetmojaveraiinin DoesAnybodyElse

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

Definitely. I also make it a point to talk to introverts. Most people don't understand that if someone is quiet/shy/not very outgoing that doesn't mean that they don't want friends or socialization.

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Midnight Express - Based on Writer/Actor/Director Billy Hayes' experience in a Turkish prison (movies.netflix.com)

submitted ago by Flusteredpenguin to NetflixBestOf

I know how you like it by Gradually_Senilein shittyladyboners

[–]Flusteredpenguin 1 point2 points ago

Dat hair!

I know how you like it by Gradually_Senilein shittyladyboners

[–]Flusteredpenguin 0 points1 point ago

N I double P L EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Wanna be first, so I can feel special. Like my new beard? btchn. by [deleted]in shittyladyboners

[–]Flusteredpenguin 4 points5 points ago

IMO, you don't belong here : )

this is my worst nightmare.. just reading it makes me feel insecure, god damn by number1jenkemguyin AdviceAnimals

[–]Flusteredpenguin 209 points210 points ago

Girl here. Had a boy do this to me when I was an insecure fat girl in high school. You guys can be just as cruel.

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