2.5 years later, why isn't the website finished? a list of excuses from a freelance developer.

Jey_Lux

Note to self. Land 10 jobs then do this for 2 years. Make $250k

Mentari

"My girlfriend and I had sex 10 times last night, so I have to rest my penis this weekend. I will get going on the next phase Monday."

jotaroh

Give this guy a break! He's had a rough 2.5 years!

acpawlek

[deleted]

NakedNinja

"i am sorry, my dog ate the website and was sick and i have to take care of him all day yesterday. sorry."

acpawlek

It's compiling......

Dinosaursoldier

"Yo, brotha. Sorry dude, but I died on the operating table yesterday. Wasn't able to sort anything out. I will call you first thing tomorrow."

sedmonster

Uncle Chuck had a very sensitive heart, so when my laptop processor decided to spontaneously combust, he had a massive coronary in a chair at Grandma's house. Grandma couldn't pay for a coffin, so she asked me to chop up some wood in the back of her house in Upstate and we'd fashion something out of that. When I was chucking the scrap wood, after hours in the blazing sun, I sliced my hand and ended up in the hospital in need of tetanus shots. I spent my birthday alone with Mr. Checkers, my only friend, cradling him as he lay on the verge of death. When I finally got the guts to take him to the dog pound to get put down, some asshole in the parking lot spilled gravy on me and ran away. My girl totaled my car and then broke up with me; now she's getting married to some mafia guy who says if I don't come to the wedding in a tux with a nice haircut, he'll cut my nuts off.

hatboysam

Unbelievable.

Can't you give the guy a few days to settle in from vacation?

[deleted]

Christ, you are a heartless bastard. I mean the man had a weeding rehearsal. What's more important that that? Do you want his fucking Azaleas to get choked? Do you? Grow a heart.

ilianh

Most of the time there is something else involved into these cases.

The developer was probably attached to the company by some kind of contract or agreement to the company. Also financially, he was either paid at the end of the project, a minimal pay or the company was on a tight budget (pay later when said project makes money). Any freelancer needs money, if the project was well paid it would have been done (unless it was paid up front, bad idea).

On top of all, many developers don't have project management skills, knowing how to do a product doesn't mean you know how to organize a commercial activity.

Also some companies try to trick freelancers into cheap labour using business tricks, they may get the freelancer to agree to shady terms, but those companies will never get a real product done.

Just because most freelancers don't have a clue about business doesn't mean they are plain stupid. Once they realise that this company got them into something not well paid, most of them will put the blame on themselves as they agreed on the terms and feel obliged to finish the project but they won't. You'll end up with a million excuses.

kushari

When a "professional" says mad sick you are in trouble

EnglishTraitor

I see things like this and I can't help but think I would make an excellent web developer on the side.

drugsrbadmmmkay

Anyone who says , "I was mad sick..." to their employer is a fuck stick and needs to be thinned out.

Aviator

I got addicted to Reddit and, well, you would understand that...

gysterz

"I have a weeding rehearsal I have to go to tonight"

I have to do these rehearsals like very night.........it sucks...I always have the worst dry-mouth

RyanSmith

[deleted]

Suppafly

Wow, you could learn web programming from zero experience and complete most projects in less than 2.5 years.

abnormalbrain

Not to cut the guy any slack, because I don't know the situation, but as a freelancer, I can't believe the amount of BS that happens that keeps me from working. From errands, to travel weddings, to computer failures. Sometimes I'm the "only one around", as if my friends and family believe that I am just sitting home all day, waiting to run some life-or-death errand for them...because they can't leave work. If something breaks, I can't just slide into the empty cubicle, pull work off the central server and go. It can be a real headache.

Unlike the developer above, I never give excuses to the client, I just cop to being slow, or simply tell them I'll be out of office. It's none of their business, and from being in their position I know how poorly the reasons/excuses are received.

css1971

So... basically, over the period. This guy has earned approx 14 times what you did. Assuming he didn't really do any worthwhile shit at all.

Follow me here...

You get paid half what he did. You take 4 months, he took 2.5 years. 4 months into 2.5 years is approx 7, doubled because he earns twice as much.

So. Who's the chump in this story?

64c

The guy's probably spent the past 2.5 years researching and writing a book on gullible employers.

pillage

Quit your job and have them hire you as a freelance web designer.

whackyjack

Fun read, it makes me sad when I see these but they seem all too common. I have a side job doing web back end freelance work and I am always in disbelief when I see/hear what other people are willing to put their paying customers through. Schmucks. I saw a form email that a lady paid $1200 for and it was just her home page copy and pasted into an email; puke green background, table cell borders and all.

rdewalt

Upvoted for "Gravy covered cat in a dog pound"

ivnewsjunkie

The following phrase is your friend: "I don't care. Get it done."

1) your boos is an idiot 2) your boos is an imbecile 3) your boss is a dumb ass 4) you should demand a raise considering the amount of cash that you saved them.

PonyGumbo

I have sort of the reverse situation, with prospective clients who email me once a year or so because they're "really ready to get started now!" One company always includes a copy of my original proposal... from 2004.

Suppafly

Reminds me of those building contractors that build half a house and decide not to come back and finish it. Let me guess, you boss paid him half up front and continued to pay him every so often hoping he'd eventually get the site done?

drzaeus

I've got to respect him for keeping all of the excuses unique and almost believable. My granny would have died three different ways by the end of two years.

troelskn

I have a weeding rehearsal I have to

Now that explains a lot.

niobevulpes

What's with the oversharing? Isn't it considered tacky to throw out all your personal crap like that?

So your boss tolerated a 2.5 year delay on a website/portal? Sounds like the wrong person got fired. I'd tolerate probably about a week or two of slippage unless there were real blocking issues that weren't personnel related.

lovesthetrees

he's not totally to blame. He was hired by people who seem to seriously lack balls.

The problem is that you hired people who don't know how to read and write using English. Perhaps you would have better luck with intelligent, educated developers?

cbroberts

This guy is either very creative or very unlucky.

Howard_Beale

"I was mad sick this weekend,"

Aw, but I bet he had mad CSS skilz yo!

Tevoc_Roux

Yo, I'm gonna let you finish your website, but reddit has the best site ever.

RobotBuddha

Can we have a list of excuses freelancers have gotten for not being paid? Just had my phone shut off because they're nearly three months behind in my payments now.

shantm79

the best excuse I've ever heard from a former engineer, "I just don't feel like it."

jordanlund

"Well now, websites are never truly 'finished'."

fiv3isaliv3

Just curious but how complicated was the site?

momoichigo

Dear mustardstache,

Is your boss looking for another consultant? I would like to work for your boss.

kleinbl00

My wife's ex-husband once explained to a half-dozen people that he was late in shipping their $3 eBay baseball cards because his wife and infant daughter had recently died in a fiery car crash. Considering he had no daughter (and his wife was alive, well, and annoyed that he spent so much time smoking pot and not getting a job), I always considered that a marvelous overcompensation for procrastination.

karenk

EVERY SINGLE DEVELOPER that I have hired has been as unreliable as this.

How they keep their customers, I will never fucking know.

delkarnu

2.5 years later, why isn't the website finished? There are two possibilities:

Your Boss did not get a clear development plan and schedule, so he just dicked you around for 2.5 years.
Your Boss did have a clear development plan and schedule made, but did fuckall when the developer got behind.

But the real reason is that your boss hired the guy, and the longer the guy was being paid, the more money already lost on the site. Your boss didn't want to fire the guy and admit that the money was lost, very common in business to make that mistake.

"I can finish this in 4 months for X amount, while this guy won't finish it for another 2 years and charge you 4X amount."
"But we've already paid him 4X amount."

Instead of focusing on the 3X you'd save him, he was focusing on the 4X already paid out.

cionide

No one has as many relatives die as programmers. We're a curse on our families :(

todolist

His latest excuse?

"You guys fired me! I'm not doing any more work."

keihardhet

These sort of people, strangely enough, get all the support from most managers... so recognizable.

2xyn1xx

I would have fired him simply for grammar. Since I'm not an IT/computer person let me ask you guys. Is this kind of crappy communication common? I would never hire a person to work for me (much less build something as important as a website) who won't even spellcheck. Very telling...

mrsanchez

i still get paid half of what he did

That part at least is normal, if he's a contractor/self-employed and you are not.

apparatchik

Big question for you. Did you pay the guy progress payments?

Nothing motivates like money.

Nothing demotivates more like no money.

mustardstache

Everything after .5 years is your company's fault for continuing to throw good money after bad.

deceitfulsteve

I like to think I would have fired him over grammar/spelling much earlier.

mccoyn

I haven't done anything for you in over a year and you're still paying me.

cruise02

"Sorry I couldn't get to that last week. I was busy updating my excuse rolodex."

Edit: Interesting technical note: My spell-checker apparently doesn't know what a rolodex is.

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