Cooks: What is the most *useless* kitchen tool you own?

snead · 4 months

Crème brûlée butane torch. Not because I never make crème brûlée, but because my MAPP torch can turn out crème brûlées way more effectively, char the skin off a chili pepper in seconds, or solder copper pipe.

EDIT: fancy punctuation

Sarthax · 4 months

I have this herb cutter that consists of something like 3-4 rotary cutter blades with a big handle and you just roll it around the cutting board and it's supposed to cut things up. You have to disassemble the entire thing to clean it each and every time because stuff gets clogged in it.

I pretty much either mushes them or just pushes them around and makes a mess. Even if it cuts they get stuck in between the blades and you have to dig them out.

I don't even know where I got the damn thing from. Thinking it was something parents gave me when I moved out a decade ago.

l0phty · 4 months

You know, I may be flamed for this, but the most useless thing that I have is one of those plunger measuring cups like Alton Brown uses. I can never get it to sit at a consistent level. Maybe there's a brand that has a tighter seal? If it had the grip of my Aeropress, maybe I could be won over.

ScottFoxKeaton · 4 months

I received some pie covers once, they resemble shower caps. Also I'm a terrible baker. Now that I think about it maybe they are useful in hiding the last debacle of a pie I attempted to create.

misterscratch · 4 months

Grape scissors. So you don't have to pluck individual grapes off the bunch but can cut them like civilized person.

mxt920 · 4 months

I actually bought one of those stupid avocado slicers... I really don't know what I was thinking.

cbg · 4 months

I got one of these "pie gates" as a gift. It is so very unnecessary.

Zaling · 4 months

The keurig, no question. Trying to find the box to return it.

knellotron · 4 months

People know I like making pizza, so they are always gifting me pizza cutters. I don't need 5 of them!

Kelldandy · 4 months

Egg white separator. It is much easier and faster to just use the shells.

mariahmce · 4 months

Being a frugal foodie, I help my friends clean out the excess crap from their kitchens all the time. Probably the most useless kitchen appliance I've seen is a Quesadilla maker. I mean, Jesus, really how hard is it to put 2 tortillas and some cheese in a frying pan. I think an Iced Tea maker is a close second.

assistantpigkeeper · 4 months

An herb mincer like this. I got it for christmas, and haven't opened the package. That's why I have knives.

tekufah98 · 4 months

http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/nordic-ware-waffled-pancake-pan/

my silver-dollar waffled-pancake pan...

completely useless... but i fucking love it.

whatever33 · 4 months

Any knife that isn't sharp as hell.

meldin · 4 months

You know those ulu knives that are popular in Alaska (or at least popular in Alaskan gift shops)? I was gifted a double bladed one with a rubber handle because Rachel Ray endorsed it. The only thing I've found it good for is slicing the hell out of my finger, and it doesn't clean off worth a damn. Seriously, it's a million times easier to slice something with one good chef's knife than it is to use the Froggy or whatever the hell it's called. Also, half of whatever the tool is called that's used for spreading crepe batter around the pan - the non-handle half, at that.

davemb77 · 4 months

A garlic peeler. I don't have any clue where it came from. It is one of the skinny tubes made of the stuff they make jar openers with. I can't say that I have ever used it. A smack with my Wusthoff does just fine for me.

melanthius · 4 months

Most useless tool in the kitchen is probably every cheese slicer I've ever owned. I can never get them to work properly, they mangle every kind of cheese I throw at them (I mean come on, cheese fucking LOVES to stick to metal), and I just end up using my chef's knife every time. Even bought a decent one from OXO, but it just doesn't work for me.

let's NOT get into the "they absorb water" debate

My kitchen life was completely changed the day I started to realize you could actually use running water to clean off mushrooms without pissing off the food gods.

That old wives tale that you are not allowed to do so is incredibly pervasive. I have no problem whatsoever browning my mushrooms.

(Special thanks to Alton Brown who showed me the way.)

aaronjpark · 4 months

3 out of every 4 can openers are completely useless.

MylesMDT · 4 months

Gifted a Salad Shooter. However, to be fair, it makes easy potato chips without risking knuckles and/or fingertips on the mandoline.

BulgerTheWide · 4 months

Popcorn machine. Why would you need that? I have a stove and a pot with a lid.

It was a christmas present, I let it sit in the cupboard for 4 years and just now threw it out. Used once, was a pain to clean and the popcorn didn't even turn out that good since you where only supposed ti use a tiny bit of oil.

A crap load of oil and butter in a pot, thats how you make good popcorn.

superdude4agze · 4 months

Things I have learned from this thread:

Everyone has something they think is useless.

Someone else thinks that thing is a godsend.

jankyhaus · 4 months

my roommate has a set of grapefruit spoons for some reason. They sort of cut your mouth when you use one.

videowordflesh · 4 months

A toaster. I hate those pieces of crap. Crumbs everywhere, uses up counter space, attracts mice, and only does one damn thing.

I actually threw mine out last month. Now I use a hot pan.

woundedgod · 4 months

Garlic press. Most common useless kitchen tool.

mice_nine · 4 months

The ice cream scoop. Since I started using my ice cream maker, I've gotten scoops for 3 years in a row. I have a spoon, people!

MustangSallie · 4 months

I got this awful thing for Christmas one year.

daglebagel · 4 months

The Ove-Glove. My mother got it for me for Christmas, I'm a chef at the Marriott. I use a hand towel for hot shit. Not putting a glove on that wastes time and is annoying as fuck.

Nysurfer12990 · 4 months

The MOST useless kitchen tool i own HAS to be the set of old attachments that go to a hand mixer that burned out a while back. They don't fit in the new mixer, but we keep them in the drawer anyway... Not sure as to why lol

hailtheface · 4 months

I got a set of splatter screens as a gift, basically wire mesh that fits over a frying pan, designed to prevent hot oil from sputtering and creating a mess on your stove top. They just don't work, at all.

As for the rest of my useless crap, I try to get rid of it so as to keep my kitchen clutter free.

formated4tv · 4 months

I've unsuccessfully bought poached egg maker things like two or three times now, always thinking "Hot damn, I can make me some delicious Egg McMuffins at home."

There's not one time where the egg didn't leak out the bottom :(

StramanamaMama · 4 months

I was gifted a Slap Chop as a gag gift. It sits in my bedroom like a trophy. The box recently fell apart from moving around everywhere so now it's out of the box.

SmashedBrotato · 4 months

Ugh, the roommate got us a slapchop. It was used ONCE, and it's been sitting in the cabinet taking up space ever since. It's such a terrible tool.

sandysquirrel · 4 months

An empanada maker. You put the flat dough in an opened one, put some filling in, close it, and this thing will crimp it and cut the edges perfectly for you. Apparently I needed some because it would be too hard to put rounds of dough on a flat surface, put filling inside, fold it in half and crimp it myself. sigh

FtotheRederik · 4 months

This weird thing. You can use it to open your cooked egg.

Loggie · 4 months

My tea ball.

The holes are too big ;_;

RandomChance · 4 months

Ginger Grater than an ex-girlfriend got me once while working at the mall kitchen goods store... imagine a little rectangular saucer with a "pad" of semi sharp teeth in the middle.

78fivealive · 4 months

This -- the Stir Crazy Robot Stirrer.

AweStroker · 4 months

Mine would be a wooden kitchen mallet. I've used it exactly twice, to break apart chicken bones for the marrow to use in a stew. I can't think of anything else that I could possibly use it for.

hyperboleblues · 4 months

Most things- 99% of the time I end up using a sharp as knife, cast iron skillet and wooden spoon. The other 1% of the time I use a colander and maybe some sort of grating device. Maybe a peeler. Yeah-- that's about it.

Brookx5 · 4 months

This is like every late weeknight infomercial in one place.

Also I have a set of 5 different cheese knives that I have no idea when to use which

mistyriver · 4 months

Pizza cutter. It's much more effective to use a pair of utility scissors.

jeckles · 4 months

A quesadilla maker

Got it from a family member for a high school graduation gift. Never used it, ended up leaving it in a dorm room commons area, hopefully it became useful to someone else.

dancingdaydream · 4 months

I once bought one of those "spiral cutters" to make vegetable swirls with.

also I have two horrible silicon pancake shapes that do not work, all the pancake mix just leaks out...

MustangSallie · 4 months

Any kitchen towel that isn't 100% cotton. Towels made with plastic usually melt like plastic.

mwproductions · 4 months

I have a cheese dome I got as a wedding gift. It's absolutely beautiful, but we've used it once. There simply isn't enough room for more than a couple of cheeses, and frankly, we never have parties where the dome itself is necessary.

After reading through some of the comments, I suspect many people here don't know how to properly use a garlic press, or why you would want to use one in the first place.

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