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[–]noahisaac 345 points346 points ago

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It's not really logical, but when somebody asks me to do something I'm already doing, I instantly enter a rage. I always have to tell myself I'm being a moron.

[–]BelleDandy 72 points73 points ago

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20x worse for me is when someone asks me to do something I'm about to do. Not one of those "I'll get to it" situations but when I've gotten up for the express purpose of say letting the cat out and someone asks me to let the cat out while I'm up. Stop pretending you have power over me!

[–]Dildont 44 points45 points ago

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im the same, makes me want to stop what im doing

[–]Jaduardo 125 points126 points ago

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Geriatric gridlock in the grocery store.

[–]joecool 762 points763 points ago

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Those stick figure family stickers on the back of minivans.

[–]angelinuh 162 points163 points ago

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I concur. Although sometimes I am amazed at how many people are in the family. Also, I am amazed at how many of those stickers I see on vehicles, as I have never seen them for sale.

[–]fiercelyfriendly 21 points22 points ago

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Thankfully never seen here in UK. Now where can I get a bulk order to sell?

[–]chriszuma 24 points25 points ago

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This guy. This guy gets it.

[–]mikesw 47 points48 points ago

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[–]xtatik222k 139 points140 points ago

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Sometimes I'll be all alone at home just enjoying the quietness and doing my own thing. Then I'll hear one of my housemates turning their key in the front door and I just think "For fuck's sake..." Then I feel bad for getting pissed off. They live here. They're allowed to come inside.

[–]drinktobones 1718 points1719 points ago

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when my earphones snag on something and get tugged out of my ears. i fly into a completely disproportionate rage.

[–]ColPickering 493 points494 points ago

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Absolutely! Of course I blame it on whatever object had the nerve to get my earphones caught on it. "WTF dishwasher rack?! Why do you suck?"

[–]n00kify 161 points162 points ago

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Whenever I ran into things as a kid, my mother would take me by the hand over to the guilty object, thump/whack it a couple times and say in the cutest Asian mother accent, "WHY YOU HURT MY DAUGHTER??"

[–]lennort 279 points280 points ago

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Every time I hit my head on something I yell at the inanimate object. That and I hit it back, like somehow that's going to make a bookshelf think twice before letting me hit my head on it.

[–]bytefactory 293 points294 points ago

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I get that rage when any wires get snagged. These fucking wires, man. It's 2011, why do we still have 'em? :(

[–]panda_prosecuter 19 points20 points ago

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Throughput, latency, fidelity, reliability. Take your pick.

[–]sammanzhi 27 points28 points ago

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FIDELITY! Awwww yeah, hope I picked right

[–]funtivities 57 points58 points ago

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no kidding. the brief moment of pain right after the earbud is ripped out of place just makes the blood boil.

[–]colonel_mortimer 944 points945 points ago

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4-Way stop. When people who obviously have the right-of-way wave me through, especially when I'm turning and they're not.

[–]Notesurfer 297 points298 points ago

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I'll add on to this. Unless it's stop-and-go traffic, I hate it when anyone who has the right of way upsets the flow of traffic to let me in. It's unexpected, and so people don't know how to react and it can cause accidents.

As a side note, in the state of New Jersey, if you wave someone into traffic and they are turning in the opposite direction that you are headed, and get hit by a car in the other lane, you can be held liable.

[–]riomx 64 points65 points ago

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x1000. This is how I got into my first car accident in Ohio when I was 18. On a rainy day during rush hour traffic, I was in the middle lane waiting to turn into a gas station.

I wanted to wait and didn't have any issue staying there until traffic cleared up, but the driver of an ambulance stopped in the opposite lane nearest to the middle lane and refused to move and let traffic go through.

It put a lot of pressure on me and people started to get angry, and thinking I was clear, I decided to go. Unfortunately, I didn't see the car that was trucking at 40 mph in the far lane. It smacked right into the side of my car and where my mother was sitting in the passenger seat. Both of us were OK, but shaken up and really upset because it could have been avoided.

I admit it was a poor decision on my part and I regret it a million times over, but it was a really pressuring situation. I was found at fault for it, too. Personally, I think the ambulance driver should have had some form of liability for creating the accident, because he was obstructing traffic and refused to let up, even when we were pleading with him to just go.

EDIT: I never go when people wave me on. Ever since that accident, I don't care if people think I'm an asshole, but I don't budge. One t-bone accident is enough.

[–]Notesurfer 69 points70 points ago

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I have made many foolish driving decisions because I listened to other drivers instead of doing what I thought was safe. This is also why I don't honk at hesitant drivers unless they are putting someone in immediate danger. Yes, they might have been able to accelerate fast enough to get out into traffic, but startling them into doing something they are not prepared for can have unintended side effects, as you demonstrated in your narrative.

[–]elnerdo 17 points18 points ago

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As an EMT, a very large number of accidents on non-highways happen because of exactly this phenomenon.

Lesson: If you have right-of-way, keep right-of-way unless there is a very good reason to give it up.

[–]oinkingbunnies 428 points429 points ago

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People who, after they ask a technical question, ignore your answer, smile, and tell you how "computer illiterate" they are. Motherfucker, make an effort to understand if you wanna take up my time.

[–][deleted] 88 points89 points ago

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It's one thing to be ignorant about something you never use or interact with. It just isn't so damn cute when you use a computer every day and refuse to learn anything about it, wasting my time instead.

So I'm with you on this.

[–]JUL1A 786 points787 points ago

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"For all intensive purposes" instead of "For all intents and purposes".

[–]UnauthorizedUsername 926 points927 points ago

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You know, it's a doggy dog world out there, but for all intensive purposes, I'm making due with what I have. My life may not be the bee sneeze, per say, but I don't take it for granite.

Ow.

[–]inuizzy 302 points303 points ago

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So its safe to say you are playing it by year?

[–]frymaster 159 points160 points ago

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wow, all the mistakes are at your beckon call, aren't they?

[–]farfle10 89 points90 points ago

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wheel barrel

[–]zweizweifunf 55 points56 points ago

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Constellation prize; mute point.

[–]badsong 15 points16 points ago

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Living Bi-Curiously through others.

[–]chownplus 60 points61 points ago

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Even worse "it's a doggy dog world" instead of "it's a dog eat dog world"

Or, a particularly rage inducing one "diamond dozen" instead of "dime a dozen"

[–]schlieffen 593 points594 points ago

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People who put something back in the wrong place, especially when it's painfully obvious where it's supposed to go.

Yes, that mug clearly belongs next to the plates and not in the mug-size spot next to all the other mugs.

[–]notjawn 113 points114 points ago

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To add to that: People who come into your office or room, pick up something and admire it, then put it all the way across the room. RAAAAGE!

[–]Margrave 109 points110 points ago

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People who open your door, stand in it and talk to you while you're sitting (or worse, trying to sleep) all the way across the room, then leave it wide open.

[–]JUL1A 363 points364 points ago

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I hate when people touch or move the chair I'm sitting in. Usually this only counts for wheelie or spinny chairs, but it someone just leans on the back of it, or does anything to make it move the tiniest bit, I get so irked.

[–][deleted] 590 points591 points ago

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Apostrophes being used for plural words. E.g. 'strawberry's' and not 'strawberries'

[–]HonestAbeRinkin 33 points34 points ago

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I give my 10 year old son a dollar every time he points out a misused apostrophe. He makes bank, especially in certain areas of the US.

[–]ScroogeMcThrowaway 705 points706 points ago

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Terms like rockstar, wizard, or ninja in job descriptions.

[–]farceur318 421 points422 points ago

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also: guru.

[–]Zing152 294 points295 points ago

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I'M A SOCIAL MEDIA GURU, I KNOW HOW TO SEND A TWITTER

[–]Girfuy 158 points159 points ago

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I've also seen job descriptions requesting black-belt programmers.

Ugh...

[–]Pinot911 94 points95 points ago

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We need a six sigma blackbelt javascript guru.

[–]phaylon 29 points30 points ago

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What if a company is looking for a rockstar, wizard or ninja?

[–]SirDigbyChknCaesar 63 points64 points ago

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Poor Gandalf has been out of work for months.

[–]trevice 520 points521 points ago

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People who try to win an arguement by clapping their hands everytime they say a syllable.

[–]cathma 77 points78 points ago

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People who try to win arguments by cutting you off and saying "yeah" "ok" "awesome" "mmhmm" really loudly throughout the argument.

[–]WarPhalange 31 points32 points ago

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"Yeah ok, sure, you're always right and I'm always wrong, uh huh."

[–]thedinnerdate 51 points52 points ago

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[–]Mizzet 261 points262 points ago

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I've never encountered that myself, sounds pretty retarded.

[–]excalo 83 points84 points ago

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[–]DayvanCowboy 36 points37 points ago

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THE WORST FUCKING THING

[–]Allons-y_Alonso 612 points613 points ago

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Wet mouth noises.

[–][deleted] 156 points157 points ago

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Part of my job is editing those out of recordings. It has made me hate the human race.

[–]Caramel_Chew_Chew 267 points268 points ago

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Entirely dependent on context.

[–]KoalaBomb 315 points316 points ago

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Not a blowjob kinda folk, are ya?

[–]abyssinian 261 points262 points ago

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We make so many compromises in the amount of grossness we are willing to tolerate when it comes to sex.

[–]ohjustflewit7 1104 points1105 points ago

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pEoPlE wHo tYp3 LiikE dIS....

Makes me clench my teeth everytime.

[–][deleted] 193 points194 points ago

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People still do that?

[–]DrRedditPhD 650 points651 points ago

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I thought we killed all those people.

[–]JoeRuinsEverything 53 points54 points ago

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Is it legal to kill those people? Why did nobody tell me?!

[–]moosicphreak 621 points622 points ago

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That's Not As Bad As The People That Make Every Sentence A Title.

[–]heyimawesome 362 points363 points ago

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I pointed this out to a girl who did it one day. She said it was OCD. Apparently she was obsessive about being retarded.

[–]moosicphreak 105 points106 points ago

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that! I dislike when people say they're OCD about something. More than likely they are particular about a certain thing, not obsessively compulsive to the point where it interferes with their daily life.

[–]minozake 18 points19 points ago

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It's probably OCPD. OCPD is you do it, because otherwise it annoys you. OCD is you do it, because otherwise the world is going to end.

[–]I_Am_From_Youtube 239 points240 points ago

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<Its Sher@mie> :)

[–]Daveyd325 453 points454 points ago

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When people say "I stand corrected" and think it means they're still correct.

[–]DipsomaniacDawg 278 points279 points ago

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Wait, you've encountered this in real life? This sounds like something Michael Scott would do.

[–]r44b1t 174 points175 points ago

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How is that possible? I'm not a native speaker and it still makes no sense...

[–]Wooldor 352 points353 points ago

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When press the button for the walk signal and another person presses it immediately after I do...its like me pressing the button wasn't good enough or something. Also, those people who press that button until the walk signal appears

[–]hesperid 313 points314 points ago

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I just remembered another incident: At work a man actually put his finger on top of mine as I was pushing the call button for the elevator.

One of the most horrifying experiences of my life.

[–]sleepingprincess 101 points102 points ago

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I would have just said "WITH OUR POWERS COMBINED...!"

[–]judsoncovy 385 points386 points ago

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people that interrupt

[–][deleted] 311 points312 points ago

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MOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[–]DrRedditPhD 30 points31 points ago

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It's supposed to be "things that piss you off but really shouldn't". I'd say people interrupting you is fair to be pissed at.

[–]yuno3 728 points729 points ago

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People reading over my shoulder. Annoys the hell out of me. Probably mainly because I read really fast and have to wait for them, but nonetheless.

[–][deleted] 267 points268 points ago

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If they make mouth noises or breathe heavily at all while doing this it makes me want to punch them in the mouth.

[–]woahlookihaveapillow 81 points82 points ago

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Okay, Helga.

[–]ZRL 251 points252 points ago

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I hate the obnoxious excess of those truck commercials where they are driving a truck up a ramp that's lit on fire. Why is that a practical test? What fucking situation will I find myself in where I need to know that I can pull 2000 pounds up a cyclical inferno??

I also hate when people walk on the wrong side of the hallway. Especially in the mall.

[–]circledot 75 points76 points ago

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BECAUSE MEN DRIVE TRUCKS AND MEN DO MANLY THINGS LIKE DRIVE THROUGH FIRE.

That reminds me of cleaning product commercials where it's always a woman talking about how such-and-such product is so easy to use, even her completely clueless idiot of a husband can use it. WE ALL KNOW MEN DON'T CLEAN, HUR HUR.

[–]snarchie 442 points443 points ago*

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People pushing into a full elevator before letting people get out. WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO FIT IN??

The words "expresso" (it's esssspresssso) and when people "axe" me a question.

[–]Tiffany7570 1920 points1921 points ago

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Slow walkers.

[–]StealthClown 1246 points1247 points ago

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Even worse, slow walkers that walk right in the middle of the hallway or sidewalk so it's next to impossible to pass them.

[–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 1293 points1294 points ago

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Let me one up you: groups of slow walkers who do that.

[–]silverhydra 453 points454 points ago

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I thought you should be pissed off that those inconsiderate bastards when they block your path.

[–]Verbicide 185 points186 points ago

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When someone is in a hurry to get in front of me and THEN slows down.

[–]dirtywork102 426 points427 points ago

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As a person living in NYC, I get SERIOUS sidewalk-rage.

[–]Tiffany7570 257 points258 points ago

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I wish big cities like NYC had walking lanes for slow people.

[–]brazilliandanny 227 points228 points ago*

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I remember being in New York and looking up at the buildings when a large black woman elbowed me in the ribs and said "Dis is Newark, we walk fast here!"

I was more amused than annoyed, I felt like I had a "real New York experience".

Edit: I realize there is a city called Newark (I was "trying" to mimic the accent)

[–]tygg3n 1032 points1033 points ago

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Reading outside in the lovely weather,when out of nowhere the wind grabs a page and turn it over. Just want to punch wind in the face.

[–]redditorguy 164 points165 points ago

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He could probably take you ... but wouldn't want to.

[–]phillipsteak 143 points144 points ago

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Bass does not equal quality dammit

[–]PillowMonster 753 points754 points ago

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People who leave seconds on the microwave!

[–]MRWESTERSPACE 279 points280 points ago

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People who think they can sing really well, but sound like explosive diarrhea

[–]Warlizard 745 points746 points ago

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"supposubly"

[–]microcline 415 points416 points ago

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eXpresso, eXpecially...

[–]greeze 188 points189 points ago*

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eXcetera

EDIT: Also, eXcedra. This one's worse, but thankfully less common.

[–]hiddenlakes 234 points235 points ago

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"Libary."

[–]FuckingJerk 99 points100 points ago

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I get so fustrated.

[–]orangefly 183 points184 points ago

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i could care less and reesie piecies....

[–]EasyReader 43 points44 points ago

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reesie piecies

RAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

[–]babyinthebathwater 198 points199 points ago

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"Valentimes Day"

[–]victoryfist 28 points29 points ago

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What time is it? Valen-times!

[–]stinas_spoon 558 points559 points ago

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"axe" as in "Can I axe you a question"

[–]fingernose 140 points141 points ago

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truthfully, that pronunciation predates even Chaucer, and has cropped up many times throughout history.

[–]Jer_Cough 308 points309 points ago*

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I used to hate that mistake but then one day, in a hungover blur, I heard a woman named something like Shaneequa use it on Springer in such a manor that I forever will laugh at the memory when I see axe transposed with ask. After the crowd informed this delightful young woman that she is indeed a Fat Ho based on her weight, fashion and demeanor, she stood up and defiantly said, "Hey y'all. Pshhhh. I gonna axe y'all two fings. 1) you don't know me, and 2) I look goooooood." (snaps and sneers tossed in as frosting). It was glorious.

[–]FugginIpad 153 points154 points ago

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manner, not manor. :)

[–][deleted] 185 points186 points ago

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You'll need an emoticon with a bigger shit eating grin than that, I think.

[–]TheRaven7 580 points581 points ago

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People that deny my reality.

Me: So this happened today.

Douchebag: No it didn't.

Me: Hold still while I kill you.

[–]staplesgowhere 166 points167 points ago

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Related to that, people who pull the [citation needed] card when you try to dispute an equally outrageous claim. Random example:

Douche: I wouldn't trust my kids with a homosexual school teacher, most of them are closeted pedophiles.

Me: Uh, I've never heard of any correlation between the two.

Douche: Really? Prove it!

(I just stepped into someone else's pile of crazy and now I have to prove a negative to get out of it? WTF)

[–][deleted] 342 points343 points ago

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you never kill them.

[–]ultramagnum 35 points36 points ago

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They never hold still..

[–]Hello-Ginge 46 points47 points ago

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I get annoyed by the opposite, whenever my mother tells a story she peppers it with little bits of completely made up facts. It gets so frustrating when I'm sat hearing her talk about an event which I witnessed and half of what she's saying is complete bollocks But she'll never admit when she's completely made something up (although I never mention it while she's telling the story, I don't particularly want to embarrass her in front of people).

[–]get_logicated 71 points72 points ago

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wet socks.

i lose it.

[–]azerbaijaniskicking 446 points447 points ago

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The Apple store. Goddamn, if I have to see one more group of twelve year olds take 450 pictures in Photobooth then forget to log out of their Facebooks I am going to pull their lips into a perpetual duck face position.

[–]Bluefalcon 243 points244 points ago

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Better idea if they leave Facebook logged in-

Post a status message of "I hate you all" then de-friend everyone and change their password.

[–]Gag_Halfrunt 360 points361 points ago

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Changing statuses is the least subtle way of messing with someone's facebook. Change their gender, or even better, their birthday. They won't notice these things until its too late. You can also be subtly evil, say, by defriending all of their black friends.

/facebook hitler

[–][deleted] 152 points153 points ago

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someone once changed my religion to "homosexual." didn't notice for weeks

[–]ruforealz 175 points176 points ago

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didn't notice til halfway through gay-ramadan

[–][deleted] 67 points68 points ago

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by which point, I had Eids

[–][deleted] 819 points820 points ago

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Not just me, but everyone:

When you take even a very mild knock to the head. Like you bang your head accidentally against a door frame, etc.

I don't know anyone that doesn't send into at least a mild rage.

[–][deleted] 529 points530 points ago

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Just adding to accidental self-inflicted pain rage; biting the side of your mouth. Mother fucker.

[–]itsamutant 400 points401 points ago

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Add toe-stubbing to the list - instant rage inducer.

[–]GhostOfAStranger 61 points62 points ago

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And tongue-burning.

[–]tidu 518 points519 points ago

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Also, having earbuds ripped out of your ears.

[–]Rust_E_Shackleford 154 points155 points ago

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This. I always have my earbuds in at work and if I slide my chair too far to the side my earbuds pop out. Then I find myself surrounded by a web of power cords and other cables which magically ensnares both my wheels and my earbuds and renders me raging like a mofo. Of course, this frustration is amplified by the fact that I'm at work, and there's nothing I can do to vent my overwhelming frustration without giving off the impression of being absolutely bat-shit crazy in front of my coworkers.

[–]brew7 1609 points1610 points ago

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People who poke computer screens to point something out. Drives me insane.

[–]lurkhard[S] 917 points918 points ago

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This should piss you off.

[–]althius1 421 points422 points ago

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I would like to upvote this 100x. DON'T PUT YOUR GODDAMN GREASY FINGERS ON MY SCREEN.

I'm pissed off just thinking about it.

[–]spleazeball 291 points292 points ago

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Speaking of greasiness, I also hate it when my own greasy cheek fucks up my phone calls.

[–]Leitensdorfer 714 points715 points ago

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I could care less...

[–]Gabyrelda 78 points79 points ago

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Jaime Lannister says that in the latest Game of Thrones episode. I rewinded twice just to make sure my ears weren't hallucinating.
I got really annoyed and disappointed!

[–]onoimallwet 522 points523 points ago

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"I don't play nerdy video games, I only play sports games"

Actually said by my roommate. I told him to go fuck himself

[–]jilko 259 points260 points ago

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I can't stand how so many people still view playing video games as a waste of time. This criticism usually always comes from someone who just watches TV all day.

[–]TheMintness 19 points20 points ago

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What annoys me more is that they don't see that playing video games gives me time to communicate with friends and relatives, who I normally don't get to see.

[–]rphillipps16 195 points196 points ago

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I'm sorry. I feel your pain. Also Call of Duty and nothing else fans.

[–]PagingCraig 71 points72 points ago

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Just newly refined "halo and nothing else" fans.

[–]Feastybeast 382 points383 points ago

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Rachel Ray. Especially when she says "Yummo."

[–]apec766 54 points55 points ago

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I kill a kitten every time I have to hear "sammies" or "E.V.O.O."...

Man, fuck Rachael Ray.

[–]Calcipher 26 points27 points ago*

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For me, EVOO is the worst. It takes about the same amount of effort to say (as it is an abbreviation and not an acronym, one which has the same number of syllables) AND she insists on always following it up with what it means. So, instead of just saying EVOO or Extra Virgin Olive Oil, she says: "EVOO, Extra Virgin Olive Oil!". EVERY GOD DAMN TIME.

[–]stimbus 269 points270 points ago*

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When my older customers want to talk about their health problems.

[–]MileHighBarfly 489 points490 points ago

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Please tell me you aren't a doctor.

[–]xerexerex 320 points321 points ago

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Prostitute.

[–]MileHighBarfly 220 points221 points ago

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It's worse when your prostitute complains about their health problems.

[–]IIoWoII 1682 points1683 points ago

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People that keep the protective plastic thingies on screens and such...

[–]joncrocks 910 points911 points ago

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And people that leave the stickers highlighting all the various features of their device.

[–]Stratager 162 points163 points ago

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People who like their own status on facebook.

[–]down_vote_magnet 1140 points1141 points ago

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People that chew or crunch loudly.

[–]remeh 135 points136 points ago

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Same problem here. Although I've discovered a few things : it is worse with people that I know for a long time than with people that I barely know and it is also much worse with people that I dislike.

[–]ArthurTrollington 255 points256 points ago*

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When someone chews with their mouth open, I am forced to leave the room.

[–]thepocketwade 31 points32 points ago*

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Like this?

EDIT - I discovered this around here a while back and realized as I read the wikipedia page that i was reading some of my own words about my wife. I don't know anything that can be done to mitigate, except making sure she isn't home when I practice drumset.

[–]aburm9113 115 points116 points ago

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Drives me insane. I have to have background noise when eating with most people

[–]redgamut 510 points511 points ago

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...or take a sip of something and make that sucking sound, followed by, "ahhhh".

[–]TransAm 183 points184 points ago

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[–]BeerGoggles 171 points172 points ago

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Oh my Jesus. Even seeing that "ahhh" written out makes me want to lose my shit and stab someone in the throat.

[–]cloudberries 25 points26 points ago

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Anything before I've had coffee in the morning. Fucking anything.

GODDAMN CAT'S LOOKING AT ME. FUCKING HELL, THE TOILET'S SO FUCKING NOISY WHEN IT FLUSHES. WHY IS IT SO BRIGHT OUTSIDE? FUCKING RIDICULOUS. GOTTA FIX THAT STEP

[–]Hydranis 917 points918 points ago

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Anybody who randomly shouts "Winning!"

[–]sophalope 248 points249 points ago

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after seeing this, I need to reevaluate my friendships

[–]GilbertM 75 points76 points ago

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"Hydranis said we can't be friends anymore"

[–]helloreddits456464 261 points262 points ago

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I dont know if this counts but I hate working.

[–]seabass0 138 points139 points ago

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Nucular

[–]battlemetal 25 points26 points ago

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People who are not spatially aware of others in the supermarket.

[–][deleted] 800 points801 points ago

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  1. Guitar players who don't know when to stop freakin' playing

  2. Anyone who lowers their Honda Civic or like car, adds spoilers, subwoofers and the like.

  3. People who make their lack of planning into your problem.

[–]whaaamo 608 points609 points ago

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let me add on to number 1.

people who bring their guitar to every occasion, and all they do is strum cords and tune it.

[–]unamerican 337 points338 points ago

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People who bring their guitar to parties and want to play for everyone. I don't even care if they're good or not. If they're not invited for the purpose of playing, leave it at home. I don't want to listen to you. And I'll be honest when you ask me what I thought of it.

[–]Tenome 69 points70 points ago

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It's even better when there is MUSIC ALREADY PLAYING on the stereo and they come over and start jamming out something completely unrelated.

[–]TimofeyPnin 230 points231 points ago

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As a professional musician, allow me to agree emphatically. I only want people to listen to me when they want to; preferably in a setting where they actively decided to come hear my music. This "I have to play because it's in my soul" bullshit people are spouting off is juvenile attention-seeking tactics used by shitty musicians who can't get anyone to listen to them if they don't force them to. If you're actually a musician, when you go to a party, the last thing you want to do is be asked to work.

[–]Kah-Neth 69 points70 points ago*

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Number 3 drives me into an extreme rage.

edit: typo

[–]meeeow 253 points254 points ago

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My friends at school were all musically inclined. Which is fine, I loved watching the performances. But every single fucking outing would have sing-alongs, host busting out a fucking sax or some shit. What annoyed me the most was that it was mostly done to get or to be the centre of attention and receive compliments. My best friend is an incredible singer and she will show you that she is at every.single.fucking.opportunity.

Musical circle-jerks are the worse.

[–]sobaka187 282 points283 points ago

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Women that wear six inch stilletos with the precision of a chimp riding a bicycle. Makes me swear and spit on the sidewalk.

[–]heyitslep 120 points121 points ago

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Come to Korea. I've seen women go hiking in no less than 4 inch heels. They've turned it into a beautiful art.

[–]jcongdon 282 points283 points ago

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I took less than a month of Italian 101. One of the few things I remember is that "panini" is plural and "panino" is singular. I hate seeing restaurants advertise one panini or many paninis. You should sell one panino, or many panini.

I wish I had never attempted to learn Italian.

[–]blackheartededitor 219 points220 points ago

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Tag those restaurants with a graffito. They'll listen.

[–]CitizenCopacetic 49 points50 points ago

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Same thing with biscotti and pretty much any other Italian term. It wouldn't bother me so much, except for the fact that I feel pressured to use the incorrect plural in public (e.g. if I were at a Starbucks or something and ordered a biscotto, I would sound like a douchebag).

[–]incredible_math 325 points326 points ago

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When people finish their last sentence in an email with "..." - it drives me crazy, because I want them to finish their thought, but I know they won't. Gah! I am pissed off thinking about it...

[–]dhpii 65 points66 points ago

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Obese parents feeding their kids fast food or the like.

[–]MileHighBarfly 779 points780 points ago

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I get kinda pissed/depressed when I hear certain celebrities are getting married or pregnant. Such as: Natalie Portman is having a baby! Then I think to myself "Damn, guess it's official, I am never going to fuck Natalie Portman". Because my odds were so good before she got married and pregnant, but she just couldn't wait for me any longer, right?

[–]Willie_Main 438 points439 points ago

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I grew up near a pretty notable engineering school which also had a decent business management program. A rumor surfaced that the Olsen Twins were looking to go to college for business and that they might come to the school in my home town. So much so, that one of the local news stations ran the story.

My friend, a complete moron, got really excited when he heard this news and talked about it non stop, like he had a chance of scoring a threeway with them. He rambled on for about two months and one day I just couldn't take it anymore. I ended up freaking out on him about how the Olsen Twins would not find a plimply face, 18 year old with no job, car or future aspirations in any way appealing. I brought up how he could barely run a mile in 11 minutes and reminded him of the time we found his self illustrated Dragon Ball Z porn under his mattress. My rant went on for about 15 minutes and I completely left him in shambles. Oh, and the Olsen Twins never came to that school.

[–]MileHighBarfly 441 points442 points ago

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Jesus. What do the people who don't like him say to him?

[–]brianbrianbrian 325 points326 points ago

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Nah, your friends have a responsibility to give you a reality check, harshly if necessary.

Having been on the receiving end of those checks, I'm actually kind of disappointed they didn't nail me sooner.

Now I'm kind of curious about this DBZ comic though.

[–]caprican27 425 points426 points ago

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"Oh, I don't really read much, although I do love Twilight!"

I shouldn't judge a person on their reading preferences, but it irks me still

[–]gnome_on_fire 262 points263 points ago

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when people honk at me to go AS SOON as the light turns green. they always seem to hold it longer than necessary as well. it makes me not wanna go. actually, i think this is a legit reason to be mad

[–]DJ_BellisiMo 861 points862 points ago

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people switching lanes without signaling.

[–]casey_ryback 422 points423 points ago

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That pisses me off too, but it shouldn't be in this thread, because it is seriously dangerous and therefore the anger is justified.

[–]Boomies 182 points183 points ago

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People who slam on their brakes to-an-almost-complete-stop suddenly to turn without signaling.

[–]StealthClown 489 points490 points ago

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People that believe of is a verb. Should of, would of, etc. shudders

[–]anniebananie 49 points50 points ago

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Where I come from, "should of" and "should've" sound pretty much exactly the same in speech. It's pretty infuriating to see it written though.

[–]EatingSteak 275 points276 points ago

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We should try and educate people better.

[–]FluidChameleon 85 points86 points ago

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Subtle, evil. I like it.

[–]Jack117 18 points19 points ago

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People who don't seem to understand the "let people get off first, so that there's room to get on" rule. (elevators, trains, etc.)

[–]dyemend 1086 points1087 points ago

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Girls that are skinny, but think they are fat.

[–]Inaudible_Whale 340 points341 points ago

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Girls that are skinny, but say they are fat. FTFY

[–]critical91 919 points920 points ago

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People that switch around your and you're.

[–]ButtsMcKracken 139 points140 points ago

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People who eat loudly or with their mouths open.

[–]EllenPage 345 points346 points ago

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People in general.

[–]cerialthriller 729 points730 points ago*

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Ugg boots.

EDIT: I know people who have not hired people they interviewed because they wore Ugg Boots.

[–]itsamutant 643 points644 points ago

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So my sister is 23 now, but at the time of this story was probably about 18. Ugg boots were all the rage and of course she and all of her friends all had at least one pair.

This one evening, we and the rest of my family were sat around the dinner table and the conversation turns to her new Uggs.

Her: "I can't believe how comfy and warm they are! They're like pillows for my feet!"

Me: "I should hope so - God knows how many Uggs they killed to line your boots with that fur"

Her: nervous laugh "err, what?"

Me: "Oh yeah the Ugg is a bird native to Australia. It has really thick fur to keep its chicks warm after they hatch."

Mum realises what's going on and chimes in with "Yeah I saw on the news the other day they're an endangered species now - they've been hunted almost to the point of extinction."

So my sister is almost in tears by this point and sheepishly looks away as she realises the atrocities that have been committed so that she can stride around in comfortable footwear.

Eventually of course she figured out that this in fact wasn't the case, and was appropriately miffed and embarrased. The best part? She's now a fully qualified teacher :)

[–]milklover6 81 points82 points ago

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People that type with caps lock on.

[–]number7 279 points280 points ago

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except for POLITEALLCAPSGUY. He's an upstanding gentleman.